I have begun to believe my mind is full of tiny little topics that act like pimples.

No one can predict the order they start to fester in, or when they’ll get ripe and burst.

Tuesday, 30 October 2012

A Wake-up Warning for WannaBe Growers

A Call to Arms for Growers (Part 1)

It seems I have to apologize to you, my readership again. My critical insensitive partner and chief marijuana advisor just rapped my knuckles. He says I’ve departed from my primary focus on marijuana growth and launched off on a legal/medical/cop/secrecy tangent. Well, he’s right but I’m a stubborn SOB and I don’t go away, I’m staying there until I get answers, but:
While I wait for them I’m getting back on track with a warning to anybody with the intention of Growing Pot Legally. That’s right-“Legally”.

It doesn’t matter when or how we get there, it’s supposedly a given that sometime in the future we will actually have the right to grow pot granted us by the Federal government. That may be but I’m afraid I’ve got bad news and good advice for anybody intending to capitalize on the opportunities appearing on the horizon. Put on the brakes and listen up. There is an enemy waiting for you and you’re living right there under its fangs.

It doesn’t matter how you get it but:

You just opened the envelope and there it is: your Health Canada Grow op license

What now?

Well guys at this point you come face to face with the monster; City Hall.

From the lack of comment or awareness on the Web, nobody’s really taking a good hard look at the feasibility of growing pot under city Ordnance and by-law but right now you’re all at the same start line. Doesn’t matter what resources you have available, you now have to find a place to grow the stuff. Then you have to go to City Hall and apply for Municipal License to grow it. Good Goddamn Luck. You are now in a game with a baffling bullshit bureaucracy who has been planning for this with great anticipation:  probably for the last several years. They’ve laid out the nastiest vindictive set of obstructions imaginable and you are going to have to overcome them all. I’m not bullshitting you and here is the proof.

In the way back past, I had a post, I Got a Reply from City Hall that provides us with a warning if we’re only smart enough to recognize it.

That is now found at

The reply I received was a set of three documents that makes marijuana growth only possible on a Commercial scale that can be attained by only the very rich and (cynically) friends of Harpo.

The three documents are:

1.       City of Surrey Controlled Substance Property Bylaw 2006 No 15820                  A Bylaw to regulate, prohibit or impose requirements respecting controlled substance properties.                                                                                                             ADOPTED by the Council on 13th day of February, 2006. A

2.       CITY OF SURREY BY-LAW NO 17410                                                                   A by-law to license and regulate the cultivation and production of Medical Marijuana                                                                                                                         ADOPTED by the Council on 27th day of June, 2011.

3.       CITY OF SURREY MEDICAL MARIJUANA PRODUCTION LICENSE APPLICATION FORM                                                    Unknown Date of origin

All three of these documents are available in the bottom three paged to the right of this text.

The first step in the process to legal growth now is the Application. 99% of you considering growing won’t have a hope in hell of meeting the requirements: + or – 1%.

Pay attention because it doesn’t matter where you live in this country, the Surrey Laws are the model for all municipalities to restrict and control Marijuana. Surrey’s infamous Fire Chief Len Garis and his national cohorts have used the past six years to spread their vile bullshit and lies to every Mayor and Fire Chief in the country. I can’t find it again but there’s actually a template on the Web somewhere out there. The guys who dreamed up this application for has to have been Machiavelli’s prime student. The son of a bitch has really covered tall the bases.
Take a look at it and cringe

Page One isn’t too bad but then at the bottom they require one minor detail more

** Property must be 2 hectares (5 acres) or larger before agricultural or horticultural use permitted

Bummer! Oh well: If that’s not a problem for you now we come to page two.
I hope you did a great deal of planning because now they want

  1. Dimensional floor plan of Medical Marijuana Cultivation Facility (must be enclosed within a non-dwelling building.
  2. Ventilation plan (must include how system prevents any offensive odour from leaving building)
  3. Prevention of harmful mould growth plan
  4. Remediation plan
  5. Security and lighting plan (must include monitored alarm system)
  6. Electrical, lighting & equipment plan including electrical distribution plan & demand load
  7. Storage plan
  8. Medical Marijuana disposal plan (must include how non-used plant material is disposed of)
  9. Designated-Person Production License (Additional Check List)
  10. Delivery plan (to patients)
  11. Security camera use and placement plan
  12. Neighbourhood responsibility plan
  13. Medical Marijuana disposal plan

Criminal Record check
       (NOTE: any previous convictions for offences under the Controlled Drugs & Substances Act may result in this application being refused)
   Written permission from property owner (if tenant is holder of license

If by some miracle you can get past this point you now have the problem of the bylaws to contend with, you know, just another minor detail
Fees and Service Costs
1. Special safety inspection, including initial property research, the posting of a notice of inspection and the initial inspection

2. After the initial inspection, each additional inspection, per inspection
3. For a subsequent inspection if the owner or occupier has failed to undertake an action by the Fire Chief, the Council or a person authorized under the bylaw to order the action

4. Shutting off a water service
5. Re-connecting a water service
6. Re-inspecting and re-sealing a water service after alteration or tampering
7. All applicable permit fees payable under applicable City bylaws.

Service Costs
The following service costs apply under this bylaw:
1. Item (a) in the definition of service costs – administration and overhead
2. Items (b) through (i) in the definition of service costs
Actual cost to the City

All fees are subject to applicable taxes.

I don’t like dumping on other people’s plans but reality is reality and can’t be avoided. No-one knows the future for certain but the Laws and By-Laws already in place can’t be circumvented.

To bring this to conclusion, I suggest you ask your City Hall what they have planned for your reception as a potential grower. I don’t know what you will find but I suspect the By-Laws you encounter will reflect the Surrey Model in having deterrent requirements beyond the reach of the majority of applicants, like:

  1. A minimum 5 acres to grow your crop in or on,
  2. Multiple plans in ridiculous detail that takes months to prepare (10+?)
  3. About $5000 for an initial start to the process, and
  4. Piss pot full of money to pay for what must now follow!
Preparing a By-Law compliant premise and that isn’t going to be easy.

Now, if you haven’t depression-ed out by this point and given the whole idea up, I suggest you now look at Surrey’s two By-Laws and please control your nausea.

I’m ending this now but there will be a continuation in an upcoming post. Knowing what we are up against, we now know what has to be changed, and I have some ideas simmering on the back burner.

Until the Blaine Barrett