I have begun to believe my mind is full of tiny little topics that act like pimples.

No one can predict the order they start to fester in, or when they’ll get ripe and burst.

Sunday 7 April 2013

A New Story of Creation

The Origin of Google Dot Com
Just
For the Record

In ancient Israel, it came to pass that a trader by the name of
Abraham Com did take unto himself a young wife by the name of Dorothy.

And Dot Com was a comely woman, broad of shoulder and long of leg.

Indeed, she was often called Amazon Dot Com.

And she said unto Abraham, her husband, 
"Why dost thou travel so far from town to town with thy goods when 
Thou canst trade without ever leaving thy tent?"

(And Abraham did look at her as though she were several saddle bags
short of a camel load
,) but simply said, "How, dear?"

And Dot replied, "I will place drums in all the towns and drums in
between to send messages saying what you have for sale, and they will
reply telling you who hath the best price. The sale can be made on the
drums and delivery made by Uriah's Pony Stable (UPS)."

Abraham thought long and decided he would let Dot have her way with
the drums. And the drums rang out and were an immediate success.
Abraham sold all the goods he had at the top price, without ever
having to move from his tent.

To prevent neighbouring countries from overhearing what the drums were saying, Dot devised a system that only she and the drummers knew.  It was known as Must Send Drum Over Sound (MSDOS), and she also developed a language to transmit ideas and pictures - Hebrew To The People (HTTP).

And the young men did take to Dot Com's trading as doth the greedy
horsefly take to camel dung. They were called  
Nomadic Ecclesiastical Rich Dominican Sybarites, or  
NERDS.

And lo, the land was so feverish with joy at the new riches and the
deafening sound of drums that no one noticed that the real riches were
going to that enterprising drum dealer, Brother William of Gates, who
bought off every drum maker in the land. Indeed he did insist on drums
to be made that would work only with Brother Gates' drumheads and
drumsticks.

And Dot did say, "Oh, Abraham, what we have started is being taken
over by others."

And Abraham looked out over the
Bay of Ezekiel, or eBay as it came to
be known. He said, "We need a name that reflects what we are."

And Dot replied, "Young Ambitious Hebrew Owner Operators."

"YAHOO," said Abraham.

And because it was Dot's idea, they named it YAHOO Dot Com.

Abraham's cousin, Joshua, being the young Gregarious Energetic
Educated Kid (GEEK)
that he was, soon started using Dot's drums to
locate things around the countryside.

It soon became known as God's Own Official Guide to Locating
Everything (GOOGLE)
.

That is how it all began.

And that's the truth....

And since it is now circulating on the Net, it must be Truth, mustn't it.

GOTCHA
Blaine

Saturday 6 April 2013

The Dickhead Duncan Defense


The  Reasons  for  Judgment  in Regina  v.  Duncan

The Dickhead Duncan Defense


Today I was sent a link to the COURT FILE and the Reasons for Judgment  f or  Regina  v. Duncan by Justice Fergus O’Donnell  that was just released 26  March,  2013. 

It’s not new news, has nothing to do with Marijuana, but it is fascinating reading because once again it involves cops breaking the law and getting away with it,

The normal fate of the majority of any criminal or misconduct complaints against law enforcement officers would be dismissal for any number of trivial excuses. If the initial complaint commission entrusted with cop discipline could not ignore it, there would be a referral to a bunch of brother cops in another jurisdiction. Even if they fail to exonerate their brother, the consequences are minimal: suspension with pay until a plea deal followed by house arrest. That is not cynicism: that is reality. It’s a two tier justice system: one for cops the other for us.

This case is different: At 3 AM the cops confronted a civilian in front of his house and demanded he provide identification. He had done nothing wrong and refused to do so. They harassed him, arrested him for no reason, Tasered him, handcuffed him, processed him, and charged him under the Highways and Traffic Act with failing to signal to signal a left turn into his driveway and refusing to identify himself when requested to do so. They justified the Taser use with an allegation he resisted arrest, by walking away.

They f**ked up; there is no identification requirement under the Act. Mr. Duncan attempted to defend himself with a barrage of totally nonsensical evidence via Google. Judge O’’Donnell was forced to wade through this swamp of information and at the end his conclusion was that the arrest was illegal and threw the case out. He then sat down and wrote his reasons for doing so.

What he wrote is not just a legal document; it’s an exercise in judicial sanity, common sense, sarcasm, humor and disappointment by a very smart and astute man.  It’s well worth reading just for the imagery and caustic comment. It restores some of the faith I have lost in our Judiciary.

Anyone who reads it will be impressed but one point is missing: The cops broke the law because they were ignorant of what the law was. Ignorance is no excuse, but it doesn’t apply to cops. They stop an innocent civilian, make unjustified demands and when he doesn’t submit to their arrogant authority, harass him, arrest him, Taser him  unjustifiably, handcuff him, and unjustifiably detain him while they prepare their fallacious charges.

The judge shows they broke the law and there is no consequence under Criminal Law.  The Crown was aware of the details but will do nothing.. To prosecute the cops they would have to explain their approval of the charges, and to admit that they were sanctioning an illegal prosecution. It would have resulted in a normal conviction with serious consequences for Duncan if it had succeeded.  There will be no prosecution for the crime committed against him.

What really pisses me off is the National Post. This work is presented as the funny exposure of a fools attempt to defend himself with a pile of bullshit from the web. They don’t even suggest that the cops might have been guilty of assault because they are turning the same blind eye to the illegal arrest and prosecutions of both Doctor’s Kamermans and Saul for Marijuana fraud.

Enough sour grapes. Read on and enjoy a legal decision for a change. It’s a rare experience you may never have again in your lifetime.


Enjoy
Blaine
The Smee Goan Guy

Tuesday 2 April 2013

My Revenge-Justified and Explained


My Revenge-Justified and Explained

The Study: Why We Really Enjoy Getting Revenge

After nearly three thousand years of research, Science has finally managed to explain what has always been common sense to the average man. The following article extracted from someplace else on the Web provides an explanation for the true to life story that follows it:

Revenge is sweet. When we are wronged by someone, most of us take great pleasure in yelling at that person. There's a reason for this. According to new research from scientists at the
University of Zurich in Switzerland, revenge is linked to the area of the brain associated with enjoyment and satisfaction. The BBC News Online reports that this may explain why so many of us choose to reprimand others when they break the rules or abuse our trust.

The study

The Swiss researchers tested seven pairs of men as they played a game that involved an exchange of money. The men were each given 10 units of money and told they could increase their winnings if they trusted one another. They could not see each other while they were playing. Player No. 1 was given the option of keeping all his money or giving it to his opponent. If he kept it to himself, he didn't make anything extra, but if he gave it all to his opponent, the opponent's winnings would quadruple. Player No. 2 was then asked whether he wanted to keep the money or share it with his opponent. If he failed to share it, the first player would be asked whether or not his opponent should be punished. They were given one minute to make their decision, during which time the scientists monitored their brains using positron electron tomography, or PET, scanners.

The results:

If one of the men didn't play fair, he was usually punished by the other. In fully six out of the seven cases, the opponent chose to reprimand the other player. During the reprimand, the dorsal striatum region of the brain was activated, an area known to be involved in feelings of enjoyment and satisfaction. This same area lights up when someone who is in love sees a photograph of his beloved. "It suggests that there is a satisfaction associated with punishing norm violations--they have been cheated, they feel bad in that situation probably--and now by punishing, they feel less bad," study co-author Dr Ernst Fehr told the BBC News.

"Instead of cold, calculated, reason, it is passion that may plant the seeds of revenge," psychologist Brian Knutson of
Stanford University wrote in a commentary accompanying the study findings that were published in the journal Science. He equated it to an aggressive driver who refuses to allow another car to pass in front of him in heavy traffic. "After squeezing back the intruder, you can't help but notice a smile creep onto your face," Knutson wrote in Science.

_______________________________________________

Finally a scientific justification for the following incident:


Classic Revenge

A Christian says: "Do unto others..."
A Jew says: "An eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth"
An Arab says: "Harm one tooth in my head and I'll have
your whole damned mouthful."


Revenge, they say, is sweet. They are wrong. Revenge, if taken properly, well thought out in advance, executed with precision, and successful in its outcome, is probably one of the most soul satisfying endeavours in which a person can engage. It is not just a matter of getting even, it's a matter of doing the other bastard just a little bit better and sticking it to him right where he lives.

The other morning when I was out for a coffee, I was joined by the Madame of our local whorehouse. During the course of our discussion of business practice and procedures in general, she told me the story of one of her customers that, to me represents the epitome of successful revenging practice. An insult or hurt was received, an appropriate remedy for that hurt was established as a goal, and a plan was devised to effectively unite the perpetrator of the crime with the remedy.

It seems the Madame was awakened the other morning by a terrific pounding on the door of the whorehouse. She rushed down to greet this early business opportunity, but when she opened the door was surprised to find only a little boy standing on the step. He was quite agitated and upset and she could see that he had been crying, so she asked what she could do for him. He looked her straight in the eye and with barely contained rage in his voice told her he wanted a whore.

She was taken aback by this, and enquired as to his age. He bluntly told her that that was none of her business, he had enough money, produced a wad of bills to verify this assertion, and told her she could take it or leave it, he didn't really give a shit. If she didn't want his money he knew who her competition was in town and he'd just go there, so make up her mind, yes or no? Well, cash is cash, and it was better she take it now and keep it from that gutter crawling bitch who ran that low class brothel down the street.

Resolving to do business with him, and with total customer satisfaction an established policy of the house, she agreed and asked if he had any preference when it came to his choice of whores. He told her he really didn't give a shit what the bitch looked like or how old she was but, she had to have Syphilis. The Madame was totally astonished by his request and refused to proceed any further with the business until he explained why he would want to contract this horrible sexual disease.

The boy thought it over for a minute and then, with a look of enraged anticipation on his face, told her:


Well, she'll give it to me,

I'll give it to Sis.

Sis'll give it to Dad.

Dad will give it to Mom,

Mom will give it to the Postman,

and

That's the son-of-a-bitch that stepped on my frog.